Ken, Dick and John by the river.
By Guest Blogger Jan Nowak, Communications Director, Bethesda Lutheran Communities
Home. One word, many meanings. For Ken Larson, Dick Servatius and John Zidlicky, three men with intellectual and developmental disabilities, the definition of home has changed dramatically during their path to independence. For years, Ken and Dick called the Bethesda Lutheran Communities residential facility in Watertown, Wis., “home,” while John lived with his parents until he was 35 years old.
Years later, in the mid-1980s, home changed for all three men when they became residents of a Bethesda 24-hour supervised group home in Aurora, Ill. There, the opportunity to learn new skills advanced their desire to live with greater independence in a smaller home setting. Their definition of home changed again in the early 1990s when the men moved out of the group home and into an apartment.
Then, in 2003, the opportunity of a lifetime was made available to them. Bethesda staff learned of an Illinois state government program for first-time homebuyers and helped the men apply. Supported by Bethesda for years, Ken, Dick and John seized every opportunity to learn skills that would advance their independence. They were ready for this move, and once Bethesda presented a plan to family members, the men took the bold step to purchase a house. Now 10 years later, the men have once again redefined their meaning of home. Today, Ken, 57, Dick, 65, and John, 58, are the only homeowners of the nearly 2,000 people Bethesda serves in residential settings throughout the country.
Ken, Dick and John waited a lifetime for this kind of independence and are proud to share their home with visitors and friends. They beam with pride when they invite friends for dinner and show them the photo albums that showcase the many rich chapters of their lives. Bethesda remains active in the men’s lives. Staff help them manage finances, provide transportation, plan healthy meals and coach to ensure safety. But doing the things that make a house a home – that is up to Ken, Dick and John.
Each man does his own laundry and they take turns preparing meals. They maintain a schedule for completing chores and yard duties. They take the bus to work, make their own lunches, shop at the local grocery store and budget for the things they want to buy. This is the independence Ken, Dick and John spent a lifetime preparing for. This, to them, is what home is all about.
Each man has his own room, complete with family photographs, a recliner, television and sports décor that represents their team allegiances.
Ken is the most social of the three. Quick to engage in conversation, he has a warm smile and loves to collect new recipes for a project that was designed for him to meet new people. He takes enrichment classes to gain skills that will equip him for a job in the community.
John is quiet, and in many ways, the house leader. He has a wide variety of interests that include bowling, swimming and taking piano lessons. He loves to cook and has an interest in gardening. Very organized, John is the main reason the house is always ready for visitors.
Dick is thoughtful and weighs his words carefully before speaking. The oldest of the three, he is determined to maintain his treasured independence. His goal is to not use a wheelchair. He has a strong relationship with his mother and looks forward to her weekly calls.
The men keep a robust social calendar. They are active in their community and church; attend concerts, plays and movies; and participate in a variety of recreational activities.
According to Bethesda staff, Ken, Dick and John are rock stars who love their lives. Yes, owning a house is a piece of that, but for these men, being active in the community and feeling the dignity and respect being independent offers is at the heart of what they value most. To them, that is home.
Read more and view a video about Ken, Dick and John at www.BethesdaLutheranCommunities.org/AtHome.
Jan Nowak is the communications director for Bethesda Lutheran Communities, a national provider of supports and services for people with intellectual and developmental disabilities. Established in 1904, Bethesda offers services for individuals and their families, including a variety of residential settings, supported living programs, employment assistance, retreats and outreach services.
I am on SSI, I am very sick. I have many painful illness, which ultimately ended my marriage of 33 years. I collect SSI and Medicaid, which will not pay for a few must needed perscriptions, which I am doing without. Among the many medical problems that started 4 years ago, I developed a pain in stomach and could not eat. Long story short, I was losing weight so fast I felt life slipping away. I went to a surgeon who told me I needed surgery asap. He cut my intestine and it closed shut. I have to live on purred food on good days and many liquid protein drinks, and many others which are over $11.00 for a six pack of Boost, Ensure, Glucrna, etc., which is the best because its not too thick and filling. I struggle every day in pain with the many medical problems. I cannot afford all I need to survive, I have been struggling. I live in subsidized housing. My whole married life I had my own home. I like where I live, but miss my own home. I wish I could find help. I get my grandchildren on some weekends, they keep me going, but I wish I had my own home or apartment where I did not have to worry if I make too much noise and the many other problems that come with close living. The people are noisy and complain too much. I am finding it hard to live in a complex and wish I could afford my own place. I dedicated my whole life to my two sick parents. I was 16 when I quit school to run the family mom & pop store. I married and had 2 children and a husband. When I got sick, I continued to do all I could to take care of my family. Now I am alone, sick and on a fixed income, 57 years old. Wish I could find a nutrionist who could help me learn to eat, and the pain I endure on a daily basis is terrible, stenosis of the spine, bad arthritis due to
disk problems, arthritis, fibromilaga, surgery too which left me in pain 24/7. Now I am anericic due to a surgery which left me like this, all I want is help coping and a nutritionist. Medicaid can’t help me. I was wondering if I could qualilfy for a small home. I need some kind of direction.
NO RIGHTS IN CONNECTICUT
My name is Robert M. Yesterday, I met with the New Haven Housing Authority about them reporting incorrect information about a 2008 court stipulation between me and the New Haven Housing Authority, and was told even if I have a court stipulation and moved out in good terms and I have rent statements from 1998 -2008 and they owe me my security deposit, that I owe them rent, which is incorrect and the Court Stipulation states this. How can this be? I never heard of anything like this ever in my life. I was not evicted for none payment of rent, that is incorrect. Is this the way HUD conducts business? The local HUD office and Fair Housing will do nothing about this. How can this be happening? Is NHHA going to come after all the tenants that were evicted for non payment of rent later and demand payment because they feel like you still own them money even after you paid in full and signed the court stipulation?
You can take a look at the proof documents because I am in the process of taking the document myself to the MEDIA or TV and I will tell the Media that HUD has been told of these violations and have proof and refuse to do anything about it.
I BOUGHT a house in a rural area through a USDA loan. I paid cash for the house, but needed an additional loan besides the 50k I put in rehab. It was a 100 yr old house that was never updated aside from putting in a bathroom. I put in installation in all outer walls, new furnace, central air, new doors, storm windows, screens, floors, carpeting, electrical, kitchen cabinets (there were none), appliances, roofing, gutters, landscaping & grading water sloping into the house.
Then I fell, breaking my back, which caused me to have 6 surgeries before I could walk, with a walker though. The problem, though, was that because of a rare brain tumor doctors there would not treat me, even at the ER; they would tell me, “Don’t bother coming in, we can’t help you.” Then the county said I had to move within 40 miles of where I can get care, forcing me to abandon my house. With the help of a government program they, USDA, said if I came up with x dollars I could taken back the home. but the next week I got a letter saying I couldn’t because I moved out willingly. After the surgeries ,I couldn’t go up the stairs to the only bathroom & bedroom. I ended up filing chapter 7, but that only ended up generating a letter saying I needed to pay $516.00 a month insurance! If it’s not mine, then why do I have to insure it? I am so mixed up with all this! Even the lawyer doesn’t answer all my letters and/or msgs.
I am confined to a wheelchair and my home is not equipped for wheelchair use, including no bathroom large enough to get in with chair and kitchen is not friendly with standard height counters and all appliances are not safe to use since controls on stove are in the rear. I am not looking for a handout but do need help since my sole source of income is disability and I have exhausted all savings and other assets. Would appreciate direction from an expert. Thanks.
The program sounds like it will work for people. I hope someone can help people who don’t understand how to work it.
I would like to write to Kareem Dale about a Disability Policy for permanently disabled persons to receive Section 8 for housing when Medicare starts two years after becoming disabled.
Dear Brenda,
You can contact Mr. Dale through the White House Disability Issues Outreach Team by filling out the online form at http://www.whitehouse.gov/disability-issues-contact.
Best,
The Disability.Blog Team
I AM A WIFE AND MOTHER OF 4 boys. I have myastheniagravis, it’s an autoimmune disease. There is no cure. I am 45 years old and I have worked ever since I was 16 until I got ill. I do not like to depend on anyone. Then me and my family moved to another state because my husband got a better job. In Dec., we went to Ohio and I fell on some ice and broke my back, L-1. My family is treating me like dirt. I have to have a clean house. They will not help clean, so the house is a mess. I have been married for 20 years. It seems like since I am depending on my husband because I am sick he does not want to be here for me.
Pamalla,
I’m sorry to hear of your illness and the stress that it’s caused. I will suggest that you have your boys depending, of their ages, to do light chores. Maybe you can find someone you trust, in your church or community that would come clean at least once a week. I don’t know why your husband is not giving you the support you need. You say you’ve been married 20 years, seems like your husband is committed, but he may not know how to handle you being ill. He might not understand how much you really need him. Maybe you could have your minister or counselor to counsel the both of you. I wish you the best.
I am 63 female disabled in 2004. I purchased my home in 2000. I worked for Sprint PCS and had a good income. Commuted 2 hrs each day to work. Paid everything. My income was great and credit was good. I paid off my 2nd mortgage with my 401 money. Now I’m disabled with $1,017 income a month. Bank of America will not work with me. I need help, they did not accept the offer for refinance. I owe $39,380, have 9 yrs, 7 months paying 6.625%. My property is worth $99,000. They will not give me a clear title to the land. All is on one title, 9.9 acres. Government can help. I live in Mountain City, TN.
I’VE ALWAYS BELIEVED THAT A CHILD IS BLESSED IF THEY OWN THERE OWN STUFF. IT TEACHES RESPONSIBILTY AND SELF ESTEEM.
Hello,
My wife and I are both disabled and always wanted to own our own home. We have been married for 13 years and in 2005, we got the chance to buy a home at $115,000.00 with $20,000.00 down on a land contact. We bought our home and have been making payments of $638.03 every month, not including taxes or insurance, since 2008. Now we are hearing that our home is not worth the money we paid for it and no one will help us get out of the contract. What can you do to help us so we have a place we can call home?
Thanks,
Matt and Tanya
How do I refinance? I need help with a disability expert in real estate law. With 2 disabled people in our home, we need to know if there are any loopholes in the Fair Housing Act or phfa.
Hi Jaqui,
If you are facing forclosure, please visit the Department of Housing and Urban Development’s (HUD) Foreclosure Avoidance Counseling webpage at http://www.hud.gov/offices/hsg/sfh/hcc/fc/index.cfm. It provides contact information for HUD-approved housing counseling agencies that can help you avoid foreclosure. They should also be able to provide you with information on refinancing and other options.
Best,
The Disability.Blog Team
Has your home decreased in value? If so, there may be a bank or mortgage finance co. that may work with you based on your credit. My husband and I were able to get a loan modification 2 years ago. It was a blessing. I had became disabled in 2007, and was unable to work. I hope you’re able to get the help you need.
That is such a blessing to the men! I say very good for them and I imagine they deserve it! People just don’t understand how hard it is to people with disabilities! I know because I am physically challenged myself and know how hard it is just to get up in the mornings! I say to these men who fought hard to overcome their challenges in everyday life, you are a inspiration to me! Good for y’all and thank you for your story!
I am disabled, mobility, cog disorder/acquired brain injury from cancer treatment. My home was vandalized. Adult protective services would not remove individual from my home. He broke in. Tossed all of my possessions out. Destroyed my years of art work, exhibition portfolios, my journals. I am homeless now. I cannot afford the repairs, there was no help. I was living in 20 % interior home, without plumbing.
If the person that trashed your home was a guest or lived with you, that might be why Adult Protective services didn’t assist you. If you didn’t kow the person, you cold have called the police. I’m sorry that you’re homeless. Have you applied with HUD to get housing? There may be other programs that may be able to help you. I wish you the best.
WOW, I have M.S. Sure wish we had a program like this in Arkansas. Way to go guys!
- Michael